More Headlines You'll Never See

Current headline on CNN.com:

"FBI director pushes for more funding to fight terrorism."

No, really?!  I'm shocked. 

So back to my "headlines you'll never see" meme, I'm waiting for:

"Government Agency Director Says 'We have accomplished our task, please close us down.'"

"Cabinet Secretary Pushes for Reduced Budget as Problems are Deemed Less Urgent."

Feel free to contribute more ideas in the comments.

Comments

[DPrychitko]

"We are a free people. Government ends at midnight tonight."

[Matt C.]

"Credit Market Fixing Itself Despite No Direction from Congress"

[Eric]

Senate votes to end farm, ethanol subsidies

[Peter G. Klein]

"State U. Receives Too Much Public Funding, Faculty Council Resolves."

[Steven Horwitz]

Oh, Peter K. might just have won the thread. :)

[Rafe Champion]

Mises Institute announces annual Popper Memorial Lecture.

[LF]

Champion's headline was great.

I'd add "Trade union leader says labour policies cause mass unemployment", but I'm not sure you would understand it in the US. :-D

[Paulo]

"Global warming links to anthropogenic CO2 emissions not clear, scientists conclude"

[Vedran]

"Free market professors at public universities admit to being less efficient than the DMV"

[Hans]

Oh, you're right, Hayek is a real boring read, says Austrian Professor.

[Nat Almirall]

From the Associated Press: 'Every Other Media Outlet Just as Partisan as FOX News'

[NEW]

Are you the owner of this lost trombone?

Perhaps its not au courant. But its certainly unexpected.

From a local British newspaper:
http://www.thisisyork.co.uk/display.var.2165167.0.are_you_the_owner_of_this_lost_trombone.php

[Jop]

Well, this one actually happened:

Film censor steps down in protest

Gunnel Arrbäck, head of the National Board of Film Classification (Statens Biografbyrå), has resigned from the agency that she has long fought to have closed down.

http://www.thelocal.se/8264/

[Matt C.]

Here's another one.
"Unable to Provide Services Due to Bloated Budget, DHS Requests Cuts"

[Matt C.]

I just can't help myself.
"Fed Res. Admits Causing Housing Bubble, Inflation"

[Matt C.]

From my back yard.

"Local Governments Admit Eminent Domain Use Redistributes Wealth from Poor to Rich"

[Dario]

Here:

"Pres. Bush admits: Invading Iraq was the worst decision of the millenium"

and

"New DHS report: money spent on airport security since 2001 decreased risk of terrorist attacks by 0.5%"

[J.Lo]

"U.S. Looks to Holland to Expand Freedom"

[Carlos Pio]

What about this: government should stop granting subsidy and protection to inneficient industries, says industrial tycoon.